Dear Gina,
I don’t know what love is. I don’t believe anyone looks at me because I’m lovable - I know that I am not. I am so alone in this world. All alone, yet I have a young child that I’m caring for and pray that I’m not transferring these demons to her through our interactions. I’m dying for attention and I’ll do anything to get it, even if it’s causes me to bleed. I hate myself and I wear a lot of makeup because I don’t want to see myself as myself. I’ve been through so much stuff I can’t believe I’m still alive. I’ve always known that I was the “black sheep” in my family, not because they say that I am, not because I don’t get told “I love you!” but because I don’t know what love is, I don’t know how to feel loved.
I’m afraid that I may fail as a mom, I’ve already failed myself. If you can feel my vibe, please help me to understand? - ?!?!